Don't touch me! No wait, do.

I have heard that a person that is touched often is generally happier. I may be making this up, but I believe that a person is "supposed" to be touched at least 17 times per day.

What qualifies as a touch?

I think pretty much anything, except it has to be deliberate.

When I first heard this, I decided that I would just go out and bump into strangers "accidentally" while grocery shopping. Of course, if I bumped into 17 strangers while walking down the produce aisle, I may just get kicked out.

Unfortunately, the person that told this to me said that it had to be deliberate.

So, if a person taps you on the shoulder to see if they can borrow a pencil, or gives you a hug, or slaps you in the face, it counts (ok, not sure about the last one).

Here's the thing. Someone has touched me maybe once today. And it was unusual.

Perhaps this theory is completely false. I'm a generally happy person. But then again, infants that are not held will die much faster, even if they are given all of the nourishment they need (this I know is true).

I think hugging is a lost art. We don't hug our friends enough. I can imagine why, though.

"Hey, I think we should hug more."

"Wait ... are you into me? I didn't know you were even gay."

That just takes you down a whole new awkward route.

"No, I'm straight, I just think we should hug more."

"Why?"

"Well, there's this--"

"OK, you're creeping me out. I'm leaving now."

So that's a little overdramatic, but you get the picture. Talking about hugging is weird.

So what to do?

The answer is obvious.

Ambush your friends with hugs. Some will appreciate it. Others will be seriously creeped out and possibly will never talk to you again.

But really, do you want to have a non-hugger as a friend?